Don’t be Normal!

I left my comfortable apartment in Woodland Hills to venture up to northern Cali to visit with my parents for my dad and my birthdays (don’t mention grammer, I reworded that last sentence 8 maybe 90 times). I drove up with my brothers that night and we all had a good time, A’s game and go cart racing both a ton of fun.

What always gets me when I travel is my diet. No matter how much I plan ahead, no matter how well my Mom stocks the pantry. Damnit I always end up eating bad food.

I brought bars, I avoided gluten, I ordered the fish and veggie dishes, but as we all know when you’re with family we all do things that we regret.

Lucky for me the only thing I regret is food choices.

Prime example, Sunday afternoon. The LAST meal we ate together.

After some good clean food we were walking back to the car and my mom turns to my dad and says

I want Ice cream

Just as we were passing a Ghirardelli knock-off in down town walnut creek.

Fast forward 10 minutes and I have a 18 pound waffle cone of ice cream in front of me, and, coming from a child hood where the ice cream cones used to tell me to “Eat it all,” I started after it like a hound on a rabbit.

A few licks into it I realized that this was not the best idea

A few more I figured I should probably stop.

About 1/2 way I was a man possessed, my mind said no, but my heart said keep it up.

3/4 through I threw that bitch away.

Not it, but about the same size

About the same size

Now I want you to learn from my mistake, which was NOT, as you might think ordering the ice cream, or eating it as long as I did, it was what I ordered.

Instead of the Jr. Size that looked kinda wimpy I went for the full fledged normal cone.


With our huge assed society you should already have heard that our portion sizes are out of control. That goes for pretty much every restaurant or food place you go to.

What you have to do is order the small version of the stuff you love.

Don’t cut it out all the time.

Just don’t order the NORMAL size

And God help you if you go for the large, extra large, or the gotta-have-a-heart-attack size.

This is going to make your life a lot better. It might make things a little more uncomfortable around friends, and it might even cost more per ounce or pound (90 cents per ounce or 60 cents per ounce), but you are not going to DIE as soon.

Most people know that eating like crap will kill you. Now you can eat like crap and not die: Just order the SMALL


  • brenda ameli


    This is SO great! And absolutely right on—I felt the same way!